


paint me

by starryJ



Series: colors [2]
Category: Day6 (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Sex, M/M, brian is a caring boyfriend, implied top!brian, jae has a headache, jae sees people as colors
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-08
Updated: 2019-05-08
Packaged: 2020-02-28 10:33:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18754672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starryJ/pseuds/starryJ
Summary: everything, even simply being alive, still hurts, and he feels like someone’s just drained all of his energy, but he can’t think of a better way to spend this evening. it’s painful, right, but he still manages to smile weakly when brian goes back to running his fingers through his blue hair and sings him a lovely lullaby, because this is brian, this is love, this is something he’d easily give his whole life up for.(alt: seeing people as colors can be quite overwhelming. brian doesn't want jae to ever feel the pain again, but jae is too stubborn, too in love, too purple.)





	paint me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [zenlikestowrite](https://archiveofourown.org/users/zenlikestowrite/gifts).



> i accidentally deleted this instead of editing when i was half asleep, sorry for having to re-upload! :(
> 
> it was originally written for the birthday of my loveliest friend so i hope she'll still enjoy it. if you enjoy it too - then i'm happy.
> 
> this is a part of series so i recommend reading the first work before coming to this one. thank you. 
> 
> i think i'll take a break from writing for a while because i have exams coming soon and because my writing doesn't seem to please the audience anymore, so i should think about how i can make it interesting again without having my style suffer because of it. ye.

it’s rather dark and quiet in the apartment when brian comes back from classes. it takes him a few seconds to get used to the darkness that fills the small room before he slowly takes off his black leather jacket and hangs it next to jae’s blue coat. he frowns, fully aware of the fact that jae is supposed to have evening classes every wednesday, but pushes this thought away because, first, he’s really hungry, and second, jaehyung is an adult who knows when he can skip classes and when he can’t. to him, of course, jae is more like a baby who needs to be taken care of, needs to be loved and treated well, but to the world he’s not, which is pretty sad, if you ask for brian’s opinion.

he makes his way to the kitchen, still wondering why all the lights in the house are off, and only then notices jae sitting on the couch with his eyes closed. “sitting” is not the right word, though, cause he sits there curled in a ball, hugging his knees and not moving at all. he doesn’t seem to have noticed brian’s presence, too lost in his own thoughts to even hear anything, but, somehow, brian knows that he’s awake. he also knows, though, that he shouldn’t touch or talk to jae until the older decides that the time has come for it, so he takes a deep breath and starts looking for something edible in their half-empty fridge, but there is nothing to be found because they’ve finished everything this morning and jae’s promised to buy something or at least order takeout.

he sighs when he understands that he’ll have to cook something, which also means turning the lights on and, eventually, disturbing jae, ruining that little bubble he’s created for himself in the darkness. he takes his time, deciding that food can wait, and pours himself a cup of water instead, tries to be as quiet as possible, but jae keeps sitting still through all the noise he makes. it really worries brian as he takes a quick glance at jae, wants to say something because seeing his boyfriend this small and vulnerable is painful, is too much for him to handle, but he also remembers that it’s one of those rare times when all he can do is wait for jaehyung to break this silence. it shakes and breaks his heart, but he manages to keep his mouth shut and waits patiently.

it takes jae half an hour to finally react to his presence and brian almost believes that he’s just sleeping in such weird pose, but then jae says something and he is fast to come closer not to miss it.

“you already back from classes?” is the quiet question and brian nods, notices that jae still has his eyes closed and hums instead. “good.”

“jae, baby, are you okay?” he asks when jae goes silent again, not even slightly changing his position.

“yeah. just a headache, don’t worry,” jae tries to smile, though refuses to open his eyes and then whines like a hurt stray kitten, curling onto himself even more. “yesterday was… overwhelming,” he admits a few seconds later and at that moment brian understands everything.

he sits next to jae without even thinking about it, but then realizes that it probably hurts jae, adds more to his already painful headache, and makes a move to get up, but jaehyung is quick to catch his wrist. he doesn’t let go, but doesn’t get closer either, so brian feels, he knows that he should stay away not to cause more trouble and tries to free his hand again, but it seems impossible.

“please be honest with me, jaejae. am i annoying you right now?” he asks in a soft quiet voice hoping that talking to him doesn’t hurt the older the way he thinks it does.

jae bites his lower lip hesitantly, but still shakes his head stubbornly and in a second he’s suddenly on brian’s lap hiding his face in the younger’s broad chest. judging by the way he breathes and how his body is shaking in brian’s arms, kang can easily tell that he’s about to cry, so he starts panicking too. “shh, baby, i’m right here with you, the pain will go away soon, just don’t let it control you,” he whispers, dropping a tender kiss on his temple, and then starts gently running his fingers through jae’s newly-dyed blue hair. jaehyung seems to relax a bit thanks to it, he moves even closer until there’s literally no space left between their bodies and then brian feels it – hot tears falling onto his neck, hears jae sobbing quietly.

“please talk to me,” he asks, trying to distract jae from thinking about his headache, but knowing that right now he’s not only the cause of that, he _is_ jae’s headache because of his bright yellow color.

“yesterday was overwhelming,” jae repeats through his sobs and hugs brian so tight as if his life depended on it. “it was so good, no, it was perfect, but these colors, they won’t leave me alone! i’m used to it and i kind of like it too, but it was my first time feeling it this way, you know?”

oh, right, brian thinks, i do know. he thinks about what happened last night and begins to feel guilty for causing so much trouble by just coming into jae’s life. he quickly catches himself and corrects this thought, knowing oh-so-well that it’s not him, it’s the colors that have always been jae’s best friend and worst enemy. yesterday was the first time they’ve had sex and to both of them it was the long-awaited beautiful moment. they spent hours talking about it because brian didn’t want to rush things and jae was too insecure about his body and possible reactions to brian’s touch since he couldn’t predict how his “talent” would work in this situation. brian did his best to reassure jae and make him believe that every part of his body was perfect to him, but the older just shook his head and asked to give him more time, to which kang didn’t even reply, just kissed his favorite mole on jae’s neck and that was it.

but yesterday everything changed, yesterday they’ve crossed this line of letting their bodies become one. it was their first anniversary and jae asked him to do it, everything about him screaming that he was ready, and brian couldn’t say no to these sweet plump lips making their way to his slightly chapped ones, to how jae’s slender fingers were shaking when he started to undo the buttons of brian’s red flannel. he couldn’t say no when jae whispered a desperate “please” against his lips, but now he wonders if it was the right decision.

“when you left, i went back to sleep because i felt sick. i slept through six calls from sungjin so later i woke up to him knocking on the door so furiously that i got scared for a few seconds. i-- i started crying when i saw him because his aura was so, so bright and it hurt me so much that i had to ask him to leave.” jae continues and it makes brian frown again.

“do you still feel the same way? it’s not getting better?” he asks, moving a little to let the older get more comfortable on his lap, an opportunity jae immediately uses and presses his nose to brian’s neck.

“it does, but that’s a very slow process.”

“jae, are you sure you want to be with me right now?” his voice is laced with worry and it makes jae smile a little before he kisses brian’s cheek.

“among all the people i could be with right now-- you’re the only one i want to have next to me. it hurts a lot, but your presence is still soothing, calming, it makes me feel that it’s worth all the pain. i don’t want to open my eyes because your color is too bright, but i don’t want you to leave, no matter what happens.”

“jae…” brian sighs, not quite believing what he hears because his boyfriend is the most stupid human being in the world, but jae shuts him up with a quick kiss and returns to his previous position.

“you’re so warm,” he murmurs, but after a few seconds winces again. he fakes a smile, yet brian doesn’t believe it and decides that this is enough, too much, even, but jae refuses to let go, pouts and hugs him like a koala. “please stay. please,” he begs and brian gives up, just like he always does.

“perhaps it was a mistake from my side,” he mumbles quietly, doesn’t even notice he’s said it out loud.

this time it’s jae’s turn to frown, but brian doesn’t notice that either. his thoughts keep coming back to what happened last night and no matter how hard he tries to make himself believe that it made jae happy and that he doesn’t regret it, he still feels like the most terrible boyfriend for making his lover suffer. it’s not entirely his fault or maybe not his fault at all and he knows it, he clearly remembers jae’s bright smile and the way he drew “i love you” on his bare chest before falling asleep, but he can’t stop thinking about one certain moment.

when they were both close jae let out the loudest moan of both pleasure and pain and at that moment, brian can swear, he saw everything around them in purple. it felt weird and it scared him, but he didn’t mention it back then and now it starts to look as if his imagination just decided to prank him. whatever that thing was, jae must’ve seen it ten times brighter, he was in pain and it could easily be seen, and now the younger feels guilty for not thinking about it beforehand.

“hey bribri? are you still with me?” jae shakes his shoulder, looking equally worried now. “what do you mean by saying it was a mistake? was it that bad, did something go wrong? you haven’t really said anything before i fell asleep last night…”

“are you kidding me?”

no, jae looks deadly serious and it hurts brian the same way seeing him cry does. before giving any reply he kisses jae, the slow kiss lasting until they’re both almost out of breath, but the older still looks lost and, brian would even say, terrified.

“listen, jae. it was more than good, hell, i’ve never felt something like that, but look where it got us. i don’t want you to ever feel this way again, no matter how wonderful it is the night before. it’s not worth it if it brings you so much pain--”

“and if i say it is?” jae interrupts him, voice loud and sure. “what if to me it’s worth all the pain i have to get through? i want it, i want to feel you, want you to touch me, to make a mess of me, want you to make me moan, make me yours and have all of me. i don’t mind seeing these fucking colors in their brightest form for weeks if it means feeling the way you made me feel yesterday. when i said i loved you i truly meant it and i mean it every time. yes, i’m weaker than anyone else because of colors, but i do want to be weak for you because it’s worth it.”

he stops for a moment, thinks about something, not entirely sure if he should say it or not, but continues anyway.

“i’m so vulnerable today because last night made me too emotional, touched the depth of my soul, if you can put it like this. i see all these colors so bright today because yesterday your yellow one was driving me crazy, it was everywhere and it was so beautiful that i almost cried, but it was also painful because i’ve never experienced it before. it was too much, but i don’t want it to end just because of that stupid headache. i was given this ‘talent’ for something and if it works this way when i feel so good… then it’s meant to be. and i don’t want it to be with anyone else, i want you.”

jae’s suddenly become more energetic than he was just five minutes ago, he’s now waving his hands and blinking faster than he usually does. he reminds brian of a kid desperately trying to make his mother understand why he needs this exact toy in his life and his words are so sincere that brian doesn’t even notice how tears start streaming down his face. god, he loves jae so much.

“bri? brian!” that worries jaehyung, though, and he starts biting on his lips nervously, but brian successfully makes him stop doing that with another kiss. jae makes a surprised noise, but kisses back and laughs right after they pull away.

“we’re so stupid,” he whispers as he leans closer again and presses his lips against brian’s neck, warm breath tickling the younger, making him smile.

“that we are,” he agrees, but doesn’t let jae change the topic that easily (which he’s definitely trying to do with his lips now). “if you really are sure about it, then we’ll just wait for as long as you need to recover before even thinking of doing it again. you understand, love?”

“mhm,” jae mumbles, but keeps leaving kisses on brian’s neck and chuckles quietly when he sees brian biting on his lower lip not to moan at these soft kisses. “i can’t stop kissing you and i don’t know what to do. can you please take responsibility for making me so weak?”

“quit teasing, jae, you know you need to rest. how about you kiss me on the lips instead?”

“oh. gladly,” jae smiles and captures his lips in a sweet, but rather quick kiss and then settles comfortably on brian’s lap, using his body as pillow, and closes his eyes again.

everything, even simply being alive, still hurts, and he feels like someone’s just drained all of his energy, but he can’t think of a better way to spend this evening. it’s painful, right, but he still manages to smile weakly when brian goes back to running his fingers through his blue hair and sings him a lovely lullaby, because this is brian, this is love, this is something he’d easily give his whole life up for.

“hey, jae…” brian says as he pauses singing right when the older starts drifting off to sleep. he just hums instead of replying, too exhausted to say anything. “there is something about last night… i’m not sure if it’s even possible, but i’m really curious if you know about that thing.”

“wh-- what is it?” jae yawns and snuggles closer, taking in all of brian’s warmth, doing his best to ignore stupid thoughts of being an icarus dying in the sun. his sun won’t hurt him, ever.

“you’re the one who sees colors, but yesterday i saw the world in purple and it was… quite unexpected and shocking, to say the least. it only lasted a few seconds, but i can’t stop thinking about it. was it…normal?”

“ah, that…if you could see colors, it means we were too close at that moment. that’s weird, because technically we’re not soulmates or anything, and there are just a few people who can see colors, so getting any information on it is challenging. but it’s believed that when your lover sees yours or any other color your souls kinda become one. as far as i know it doesn’t happen all the time and it also means…”

“means what?” brian has to ask because jae flushes pink and stops talking.

“it means that i gave you my everything, but you could’ve guessed that already. that is also the reason why i feel so bad now, but i don’t regret a single second spent with you, i want you to have all of me for the rest of our lives, so--if you’ll have me…” jae smiles when brian’s warm hand finds his, giving it a light squeeze and intertwining their fingers.

“i can’t believe i got this lucky to have you as my boyfriend, maybe i saved the whole country, no, the world in one of my past lives? i could never even imagine experiencing all these things, but you’ve changed my life in so many ways and i feel really blessed to know that my feelings are mutual. you know, as cheesy as it sounds, i want to always protect you and take care of you, because this is what you deserve. i love you. jae..?”

there is no answer, so brian looks down and can’t help but feel his heart skip a beat when he sees jaehyung sleeping peacefully still holding his hand. he doesn’t even notice that he’s still hungry and their fridge is still pretty much empty, but he does notice how relaxed jae looks now compared to the way he was sitting less than an hour ago, and his heart is so full of love that he can’t stop mouthing these three words while playing with jae’s hair.

jaehyung is beautiful and, brian thinks, the universe gave him the prettiest color.

and if someone asked him, he would say that his love is purple without even thinking about it.


End file.
